The "I" In Voice

While there has been a rise in the dissemination of information on ways to ensure our mental well-being, there has also been numerous reports on individuals who have succumbed to the excruciating pain. This then confirms that between the awareness of a solution to the implementation phase, is a space that requires self-confidence in the ability to execute.

When one is battered by the grief of who they could have been, for others or self; condemnation suggests that there is no way out as the same person that got them here will only dig them into a deeper grave. Seeking professional counsel, talking to a trusted friend/ relative or journaling, all become options beyond reach as your voice is choked and your heart is overwhelmed.

Questions that sip through include, but are not exhaustive of :

1. What if I'm interpreting this situation incorrectly and formulate solutions from a misguided place?

2. What if the language I'm using is wrong and I create a false narrative?

3. What if I say something and it upsets the entire setup like it did before, without bearing actual fruit.

You develop an “All-or-anything” mindset where your beliefs are split into extremes. It’s either you have it figured out or you don’t. If your inner child’s expressions were invalidated then you gravitate towards this more as your thoughts never feel fully fleshed.

With your voice in shackles, your mind and body get into deeper bondage because you're trapped in a reality where ruin is the only possibility. Hearing that a writer has struggled with journaling may sound like the craziest of truths to some but I for one have. Understanding the sacredness of words and feeling like I can not erase what I have put out, has made me hesitant to put my heart on paper. So in the end, not only am I going through mental turmoil; I am also experiencing self scrutiny for not having been bold enough to express myself. The trauma becomes cyclic and the wound gets deeper.

The question becomes," How then do we liberate ourselves from those strongholds in order for us to walk out the healing?" Well, we use the voice even though it's trembling in terror. We say that word, despite it not being the most fitting. After all, we can not correct a note that's off key if we haven't heard it. Similarly, we can not express ourselves using the most appropriate diction if we have not dared to day the first word out. In speaking out, through writing or talking to a trusted heart, you derive synonyms for the words you've used until you find the most befitting term.

If calling your first journal entry a draft is what you need to do for you to trust your voice enough to pen your thoughts, then so be it. If you want to practise speaking to a trusted heart by recording yourself prior to the conversation, then do so. You do not need to follow any certain structure nor do you need to be chained to the idea of not making spelling mistakes or wording your thoughts in an “acceptable” way.

Our challenges with our emotional well-being can be seen as less to do with having solutions in reach and more to do with trusting that we are sound enough to know what we need and worthy to implement them. And so Progressive Heart, as you journey in highlighting and embracing the beauty, worth and strength that is in 'Becoming' may you put shame in its place and find your voice.

Brittney Moses pens it beautifully in her blog post, "Setting boundaries with your inner critic" as she says:

Dear Inner Critic,

You are allowed to alert me to become aware of my shortcomings. I’ll get it the first and second time.

You are not allowed to rampage in a cycle of shame which produces no fruit.

From my emerging voice to yours

~Pretty Conscience